Yesterday, I decided to recover.
by Y. W.
Yesterday, yes, it was yesterday. In my company's afternoon BBQ, during which served with ice cream, whipped cream, crackers, and chocolate chip cookies, I had a little of each of them. I did not even have much, but since yesterday was a "restrict" day, so I immediately lost in the abysmal of anxiety. I ended up leaving work early, drove through traffic to Whole Foods and bought everything I could reach my hands for, hot bar food, pizzas, pastries, ice cream, and of course whipped cream. The week before last week I have already been told by my dentist that eight of my teeth had cavities. However, at that moment of time, it really did not matter any more. One hour later, food down, and food out. This morning, I could feel the pain in my mouth, the pain from my cavities, the pain from acid-washed soft tissues in my mouth, and the pain from my stomach. In my past 2 years of restricting, over-exercising, and weekly binge-purge cycle, I have never felt so sorry for myself.
I need to recover. I want to recover. I wrote it here to tell everyone that I am going to recover, starting from not washing my insides from stomach acid.
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