Your bulimia recovery
Tap here to read more about the bulimia recovery program

My online program and private recovery community has helped hundreds of women beat bulimia.
Click here to learn more

Beat bulimia using my online recovery program and private community. Hundreds of women who were just like you have done the same!

Click here to learn more Member Login

Ughhh bulimia is like that movie Ground Hog day with Tom Hanks!!

by Katie
(Sarasota, Florida)

I am so angry that I have let myself get this out of control. That is exactly was it is...out of control. I used to love being around people all the time. I use to love going to the beach, going shopping, doing arts and crafts. I feel like all my hobbies have been put on hold. I have gone to counselors time and time again. I now pay for a monthly massage because everyone says online that it will help cure this illness. NO! I have never really stuck to something long enough for it to cure me. It all started with this stupid diet. I moved away from the town i was born and raised in because i needed a fresh start. Me and my current back and forth boyfriend were having so many issues and I thought that getting away and starting a new life somewhere else would help me. I had this crazy thought in my mind that i would leave home and then come back and visit looking totally different..losing weight, new clothes, and even a new hair cut. Well it back fired..I started off eating such little amounts. I lost about 15 lbs and felt great for a little while but then as soon as i started eating again the weight would start coming back on. I had no idea what was going on..i was starving almost all the time and had not had a freaking cheeseburger..let alone ketchup in over 6 months. soooo I started eating things that were not healthy at all..Mcflurries from Mcdonalds, breakfast sandwiches from burger king..pretty much anything and everything that was unhealthy or not on my so-called diet i would throw up. Im not sure when it got so uncontrollably bad but i pretty much throw up everything i eat, Especially when i am alone. I can act normal in front of other people but for the most part i throw up everything i eat. I stopped going to lunch and dinner with people because im scared to eat food that i cant get rid of. I pretty much have isolated myself away from everyone because nothing in my life seems to matter anymore but this damn piece of shit eating disorder UGHH! I can do so good for a few weeks and then i fail once again...and when i fail, i end up being worse then i was before. I feel like i am in a constant argument with myself; yes i am gonna do it..no no im not gonna do it..and almost every single time my eating disorder freaking wins. I really just have no idea what the hell to do...i just wish someone would help me figure out what i can do and where i can go from here because i miss my old fun life :(

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Bulimia Stories.

 

 

Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of your-bulimia-recovery.com
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community


The Bulimia Recovery Program