The lowest of the low.
I have met a lot of bulimics (as I have been to so many groups/treatments etc) but I have never heard anyone talk about a couple of the things that Shaye, you've shared about. I am so grateful to you for this.
The bringing up and re-eating food, I honestly believed that i was the only person in the whole world that did that, and that it was also the most disgusting thing in the entire world to ever come up with. I've done it for years. The years of bulimia i have had mean food really does just come back up and i always wonder why my friends don't notice my random chewing half an hour after we've finished a meal.
Also the throwing up in bottles in public. I do it all the time! And again, I always thought I was a freak, even amongst other bulimics. I'd never met anyone else who did this. I literally would do it walking down the street, sitting on the tube, on the back of the bus. I permanently kept a bottle in my bag and would just silently throw up into it all day long.
I always thought I must be the worst/the weirdest/the most incurable bulimic around and that i have no chance of ever getting better. Shaye, hearing that you have done all these things as well and you really are now recovered gives me so much strength and hope. Maybe I am not such a freak
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