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still on the journey to recover from MIA

by maria
(niederkruechten,nrw,germany)

My story starts when I was 13 years old. I have always been chubby and never "normal " as such. I went to an all you can eat buffet with my parents and stuffed my face with everything. when I got home I was in so much pain from over eating. my mum said to me " maria go and drink some milk and stick u uur finger down your throat but only do it once and never again." ill never forget this day. the next morning I went on the scales and seen that I lost weight and thats how it all started. from this moment on I would do it all the time even water. I lost lots of weight very quick. I always came to a point where I was so weak that I couldn't make myself sick any more. and the weight started to creep back on. then I met my hubby with 21. we got married really quick and I had my daughter. the whole time I was pregnant I wouldn't do it and put X stone on. by the time she was born I weight X stone .... my biggest nightmare so I started again. my weight was always going up and down. all I could think about was food all the time there was no space for anything else. my whole life was surrounded by food. then one day I felt my heart skipping beat and I thought I would die. Still even this wouldn't stop me. I got pregnant again and this time even done it while I was pregnant. I'm sitting here right now totally scared I'm gonna drop dead as my skipping heartbeats are all the time and my heart beats very slow. I need to stop and keep trying. I have to do this for my kids !!!

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of your-bulimia-recovery.com
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community


The Bulimia Recovery Program