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Simple Steps

by Nikki Helwig

Simple steps are all it takes,
to recover from all these mistakes,
to me, this quote is a lie,
for the days of recovery never die

the battle fought against my own mind,
is the hardest struggle i will find,
all the thoughts inside my head,
horrible memories I want to shed,

it's hard to rid them from my brain,
the embarrassment, the hurt, the excruciating pain,
this sounds dramatic to another's ear,
but for me, it is a fact, hard to hear

the want to be normal, just to fit in,
knowing that this is a hard quality to win,
so tired of crying myself to sleep,
the secret inside, just too big to keep

I want to get better, someway, somehow,
then 10 seconds later, I give up, only for now,
sick of all these thoughts, they have made a game,
against myself that I feel I have barely overcame

the light at the end of the tunnel,
I don't see it,
the happiness in this darkness,
it can't be lit

I'll just give up altogether,
it's easier that way,
but then I think of those who love me,
they would want me to stay

I look at the people around me,
the struggles they overcame,
I strive to be like them,
and beat my own mind game

Only I can make myself better,
by fighting for a new life,
one step at a time...slowly crawling up the ladder
relieving myself from all this strive

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community

The Bulimia Recovery Program