Recoveries Ups and Downs
I was bulimic for three years. I finally decided to change my life last summer, and move forward. The first few months were hard, and the bloating was miserable but I got to a place where I felt good and I felt like I defeated it. So I have been Bulimia free for about a year now. Things were going so well until I broke up with my boyfriend. I also began therapy for my Bulimia as well as other issues. I find that I am working through so many feelings that I did not address before. For the most part I have stopped the bingeing and purging but I didn't turn off that evil voice in my head. I used my boyfriend as a tool to ensure me that I would not do the actual action of B/P and now that he is gone, and I am actually alone it has all come back. I know that working with the therapist is helping and I am going in the right direction but I still feel defeated. I thought I was doing so well and now that I have had a relapse I somehow cannot get back on the horse completely. I feel like I am falling down that slope again and I just need to stay strong. I also am hoping that I can develop some SELF LOVE! I need this more than anything and I must find a way to build that love because I think that is the key to my success. I need to be OK with myself, especially when I am alone.
Hi there :)
You are so right in thinking that self love is a key part of bulimia recovery. Loving yourself will help to set you free. Loving yourself will enable you to ignore the voices in your head that tell you to lose weight, diet and ultimately bigne and purge. Eventually, with the practice of self love, those voices will disappear.
Louise Hay has an excellent book on self love that I think you would love. It's called You Can Heal Your Life
and a few girls in the online recovery program I run
have raved about it.
Little steps will get you there just keep pushing forward with kindness! When you slip up, forgive yoruself and hop back on board.
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