My journey began halfway through my freshman year of college. I am a collegiate track athlete, and our coach kept getting on our girl's team about how unfit we were. Being the perfectionist that I am, I began restricting food so I could lose weight. By the end of the school year, my urges for junk food became so strong because I had told myself I can't have it. And so begins my struggle. I would eat massive amounts, just to throw it up later so I wouldn't gain weight. I thought I had finally kicked the problem a year ago, I stopped throwing up, but that didn't stop the occasional binge or obsessive calorie counting. I was eating normally, but not enough to maintain my weight or muscle. A couple months ago, I lost a family member and suffered a major injury all at once. No longer able to workout, I felt lost and confused. I couldn't go for a run to get things off my mind. All the stress and anxiety, and fear of weight gain, re-triggered my bulimic habits. Right now I feel so lost and confused. No one knows that I have this.
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