on my way to recovery.
so i told them. i told my parents. i actually did it in may. lets just say there was many tears and words and confusion. but i told them. i told my mom and step dad i am, or well was bulimic. at first i didnt care too much because i knew it would come out sooner or later. ive told other people and my best friends, but i never had this reaction before. all i could do was cry in my mommas arms while she would tell me "you're my baby girl, and god put u on this planet because you have a purpose in life." i couldnt stop crying and i could barely look at my mom. i just sat in her arms crying at the moon. the next day i had a mommmy and me day and we spent the entire day together and just hung out together. we went and had lunch at a park and talked.
since then i went to an eating disorder center at a hospital, and i was scarred shitless. just the girls there and how they were acting, and how they had to live there. i knew i could never get that bad. not even. i promised myself right then and there to get better. and i did.
after that visit i hadn't thrown up too much after. only when i was really upset or wanted to be in control of something.
im better now. i havent thrown up in ages, but i still refuse to eat sometimes. i guess once u have an eating disorder u can never go back. everyday im getting better and better. im proud of my progress. i know i can beat this.
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