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My Wife is bulimic

by samuel
(Caledonia NY)

I have read all of these comments and still feel a great despair.

My wife and I have been together 6 years. Until recently we were amazing! We were the couple, other couples dream of. We have 4 amazing children. She had told me that she had an eating disorder as a child and had gone through therapy and yes she said she struggled with it still she had control. About a year ago she had an emotional affair with a man for about 3.5 months. I eventually found out and left. She begged me back and said she was just scared that here life was out of control. yada yada yada. We had been back together about three months when I started putting the pieces together. She was not in love with me anymore. When i asked her about a month ago she didn't deny it. She said she still loved me but was not in love with me. I found out also that she was throwing up on a regular basis. I have researched a lot of support groups for spouses and learned a great deal about the disease. I also have found that her best friend of a year is an active bulimic. I don't know how to be supportive with out enabling the behavior.
Now that we have fighting, not just about that but everything. I know we have a lot to work on. When ever we eat dinner she runs up stairs to purge. It feels like she does it to make me angry.
She tells me that she has never stopped, that i was blind. She refuses physical contact. she said she doesn't want to get better, that this is all she has ever known. She said it would be like taking away my arms or legs.
How do i get her to help - we have 0 money!. How do i get her to want help. I have tried to tell her the medical implications and that our daughter is likely to develop a disorder. But she doesn't care. Part of me says to go to CPS and report it but i would never do that. I can not allow my children to develop this terrible disease. PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of your-bulimia-recovery.com
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community


The Bulimia Recovery Program