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My Scariest B/P Experience

Hi I'm 23 years old. I've been bulimic for 10 years. I've never told anybody about it, at least up until I found this website. My scariest bulimia experience was a few months ago. I can't remember what I ate but I binged for about an hour. Afterwards I was in so much pain I couldn't stand up straight and it felt like it took forever to get to the bathroom. My stomach was so bloated and hard that it was almost like I was pregnant. When I tried to purge, I couldn't. Every time I tried it would hurt even worse and nothing was coming out. I know this sounds stupid, but a few days before that I saw something on TV of a girl that died because she ate so much that her stomach pretty much exploded. I thought that's what was happening to me. I was so scared, I really thought that I was dying. I wanted to call someone and ask for help, but what was I going to say? So I just laid on my bathroom floor for almost 2 hours just praying that I didn't die and have someone I love find me like that. Finally I was able to purge and get everything out. I honestly thought I was going to die that night and the shame I felt of telling someone that I was bulimic actually went above my fear of dying. I've been bulimic for 10 years and I guess I never understood what people meant by it taking over your life until then.

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community

The Bulimia Recovery Program