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My bulimia story

by Carmen
(Atlanta, GA)

Hi, my name is Carmen i am now 19 years old. I suffered from bulimia in my middle school and early high school years. All my life i've been having a X pounds that shouldn't be there. My whole life, since my childhood, ive been unhappy about my body image, but it wasn't until eight grade that it really kicked in. I would see all of the girls wear strapless shirts and skinny jeans. Being thin was the only way to get noticed and appreciated. At the time i was 5'3 weighting X lbs. That was just so tragic for me. I would always hide my weight from others. The day that bulimia became a part of my life was when i was watching an episode of Maury. In which he showed overweight kids. Seeing that broke my heart. I ran to the mirror and broke down crying. Thinking that could be me in a few years. That same day i began dieting. I would only eat small portions of vegetables. I would try to hide my ways from my mom. I joined the cross country team in school. And i guess this is what makes me different from other girls suffering from bulimia. Instead of going to the toiled and throwing up all i ate, i would excersise to the extreme. That was the only way, i could hide my eating disorder. My mom worried about my sudden weight loss, since i had dropped X lbs. I was down to X. But i convinced her i was losing weight due to running, but little did she know that i was cutting my calorie intake down to X calories a day. I loved the attention i was getting at school and getting to wear a tight shirt and looking down at a flat stomach. But that happiness only lasted while i was with company. Whenever i was hungry i would just think about myself as a fat pig, and by eating a cookie i would have to run an extra three miles.. I imprisoned my mind, my body. To the point where headaches and nausea would kick in every single day. The scale became my best friend.... All that i wanted, became everything i hated. My mind focused 24/7 on this strict diet and workout plan.

My bulimia storie is different from other by the fact that i didnt vomit to lose the weight, but instead i tortured my body to do extreme excersise as a punishment whenever i ate something that i thought i wasn't suppost to. I am still suffering from an eating disorder, but i've over comed and survived from the black hole that sucks you in, better known as bulimia.

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Article by Shaye Boddington
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