Life Threatening Scare - now I am going for bulimia recovery!
Lately, I've struggled quite a bit to stay motivated in recovery. I knew I wanted and needed to recover but it didn't feel urgent so I kept putting it off. I continued purging everyday like I was thinking everyday that it would be my last day of purging. (I think you may know the feeling) I definitely did not feel ready to give up Bulimia. I felt i looked great (skinny) and could eat whatever I wanted without putting on weight.
However, last Thursday I was hospitalized. I was in the ER for my boyfriend whom we thought might have appendicitis and all of a sudden, my blood pressure dropped extremely low and I almost fainted. I was rushed to a bed and placed on re-hydrating IV. I have never been so scared in my life. I had had nightmares of this moment and it was happening. I thought my heart had had enough and that I had done irreversible damage.
Luckily, my blood pressure went back to normal and the doctor said I was most probably very dehydrated. My potassium level was also extremely low and he placed me on a potassium IV drip for 3 hours.
I am so grateful now that I was alright and have sworn never to purge again. I have sworn to fight bulimia with all of my strength and never to go down that road again.
I feel very lucky that I am OK but I cannot help but wonder what would have happened if I wasn't already in hospital and if I kept purging and ignoring the signs.
I hope others who are suffering from bulimia do not do as I do and wait until their life is on the line. For me that was my wake-up call. I did not think it would ever happen until I was sitting in the ER bed hooked up to a potassium drip, scared that I might faint again.
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