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its screwing up my life

by Luiza

Im a 20 year old girl who is suffering from bulimia for about 7 years (but it became worse in the last 1 and a half year). I cried so much today, as I never have cried because of this and its scaring me so much, to think it dominates my life and that i wont be able to get rid of it. I cant stop thinking about it, I throw up from 4 to 6 times a day and eat something like 15.000 calories daily, Im happy to have found this group so people can understand me and know what im going through. Every night before sleeping I promises myself it will be my last bulimic day. Never happens. My life circles around binging and purging, eating and trowing up...all the time. Ive never told anyone, its my only dark secret and I cant stand living like this anymore, its screwing up my life that is so nice in other points...I really need help and ill try to find it here, please talk to me, I'm so so lonely in this journey and so exhausted! I don't know what to do anymore, I just wish it had never happened to me, normal is a word that sounds so great now, normal is what I wish I could desperate...Love, Lu

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community

The Bulimia Recovery Program