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im bulimic and trying to recover alone, im young help :(

For 6 months I was on and off between bulimia and sort of anorexia...

At first I barley ate then I discovered how to make myself throw up. I began taking laxatives, diuretics, and fat burner pills. For a month at the worst point I was binging and purging around 3 times a day, more or less. I dropped from X to X pounds (I'm 5'3'') and stopped getting my period. I haven't purged in 2 days and tonight I just did. I feel horrible.

I don't really have anybody that can help me so I don't know what to do. What can I do? I stopped other pills but am still taking laxatives - but I'm trying to take less.

My stomach is so bloated and I feel like its never going to go down. My fingers have cuts all over, I broke blood vessels in my eyes, and my face looks like a giant chipmunk...the list could go on. Do you have any advice or tips?

I'm so scared I feel like I will never develop now becuase of this and that I will always be fat and ugly. Everyone says im skinny but I don't see it. What should I do?

For the past days that I haven't purged (which is a big deal for me!) I have been eating great! I have had all my food and almost 2000 calories without purging. today I just lost it!


Shaye Says

Hi there!

2 days is such awesome progress - you should be very proud of yourself! I know you slipped up today - but it is not the end of the world... Think about it as taking lots of steps forward and then just one small step backwards... Jump back on board and nothing is lost :)

I would definitely suggest that you try your hardest to stop taking laxatives... It's great that you are weaning yourself off them - this is a good start. Laxative abuse is actually very dangerous and can cause heart attacks - so please keep working on cutting them right out :)

I know that bulimia bloating is hard to bear - but it's an important part of recovery... Most people go through it as their tummies heal and lean how to digest food again. Give yourself time and it will go away... When you look down at your tummy try to be kind to yourself... remind yourself that it is not fat - it is simply healing!

Is there no adult that you trust who you could open up to about your bulimia? Battling bulimia alone is hard and having somebody to talk to can help a lot.


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Article by Shaye Boddington
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The Bulimia Recovery Program