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I'm a loved one with a heavy heart

by Joe

Hello my name is Joe. I am writing this to talk about the love of my life. She is struggling with Bulimia and has been doing so for a long time. We have known each other the entire time she has been living with her ED. At first we were friends. She was very open about the fact that she had Bulimia, even leaving nursing school (which we attended together) for treatment. Over the years our friendship turned romantic and we've been together for a year now. I'm nervous because since we've been dating she doesn't like to talk about it anymore saying things like "I'm fine" or "everything is okay." A week later she is saying things like "I can't live like this anymore" and "ugh, I'm such a fat whale" and other similar things. When she has these weak moments she says that she needs to go back and talk to somebody but she never does. She is in Graduate School and I realize that this is very important to her. I feel like her health is taking a back seat to her education. I'd like to think that I'm very supportive and caring towards her and it pains me deeply to see her ignoring or using other things as an excuse to not get help. She said that her therapist was too far away to go see on a regular basis so I took it upon myself to research some places closer to where she lives. I am by no means pushing her to do anything she doesn't want to do and I just want to help. She said thank you and I've never heard anything about it again. She just seems so distant from our relationship and it hurts. I understand she isn't doing it on purpose but I need help. What else can I do to help her. I desperately want her to be okay and I just love her so much. I understand that her recovery is up to her but I just want some tips to help her along the way. There has to be some way that I can be an active part of her recovery. Thank you so much for any feedback.

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community

The Bulimia Recovery Program