I need help.
I just started over the summer. Im 16 and a junior. I don't really know what prompted me to start. I run cross country and track all year round. Over the summer I was doing 10 or 12 mile run days and I would be starving by dinner time so I would go for foods like ice cream and brownies instead of healthier things. Despite running I was putting on weight so I started binging and purging. I feel so guilty and disgusted afterward, but when I start eating I lose all control and its like a cycle. Ill eat healthy for a few days, but then ill lose it and binge and purge. I still look in the mirror and want to cry because I hate the way I look. I feel like I don't deserve my friends or my boyfriend because I'm a disgusting pig. I'm so terrified for bathing suit season and I just want to eat like a normal person again. I read these stories about the effects of bulimia and they terrify me. I just got my braces off after 3 years and my teeth are my babies. I would be destroyed if they started rotting. I only do it a few times a week but I'm afraid it will get worse. I want to tell someone but I'm scared. My mom and I get along really well but I'm afraid she will get mad if I tell her. I don't want to disappoint her. I just want to get better. Someone please tell me what I should do
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