I began, I slipped up once, and then again...
I just feel like I'm totally lost.
I was anorexic for three years, but I always had binge urges without purging. I've tried laxatives too, but they didn't work for me. I was controling my way to eat, but since three months, I have daily binge and purge cycles.
I began to follow the main advices to recover. My first week was hard, but I was full of hope. But yesterday, I was eating like a robot again. I've ried to understand why it happened, I think, it's such a habit now, that I don't really need stress anymore for binge urges. I told myself that it was okay to fall down at the beginning, I just have to continue.
But today, it's the same. I was binging from 12 am to 16 pm. It's horrible. I'm trying not to throw up. Of course, i'm really afraid to be fat. And the worst, i don't know how to continue, what to do to make some progress. I feel alone in this hell and i'm trying to figure out how to top that binge urges.
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