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I am Bulimic

I know when I became Bulimic, I didn't really know what was happening to me but I know exactly where and when it all started. I am now 30 going on 31 and it all started when in 2002. I was in a normal relationship and we broke for some foolish reasons. I was heartbroken and had stopped eating normal rations of food. I lost some weight. Alot of people noticed this and I liked the complements. Then we had gotten back together. I started eating again but worried about gaining back the weight I had lost. Thought he would brake up with me if I would gain weight I guess. Then I Started to purge after meals. Then the next thing I knew is that after every meal I would find a way to purge without anyone knowing. I ended up leaving that relationship for other reasons. Then Met the man I am now married to and dearly love. I am to his eyes perfect in every way 5,2 and about X lbs. He thinks that I am the most perfect person. But I've been hiding this terrible secret for the longest time. I just wish to beat this and live a normal life again. Bulimia had become a part of my life I guess and I never though I could get over it. I was worse before and for the past 2 years I have ups and downs. The trigger point is at around 10pm after my husband is asleep I will binge eat, feel guilty and purge it all up...

Until the other day the toilet got clogged and my husband had to unclog it. I didn't know that the toilet had become clogged since I was sure it had all gone down. The following day he straight asked me if I would throw up my food after I would eat since he found food when he unclogged the toilet. I told him it would sometimes happen, and that is when he found out about my Dark secret...

Now he knows and I am almost relieved since I tried to tell him once or twice but never was able to feeling so guilty.

Now I know that I have to get over this, and that I have help. :) for once I do not feel alone anymore with this and that it's not going to run my life anymore.

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of your-bulimia-recovery.com
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community


The Bulimia Recovery Program