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how to time bulimia recovery with upcoming events

by Ally
(UK)

Hi sorry its me again, I wanted to add something else to my last question..

I seem to always have something in the way of my recovery. The latest one is my cousins wedding is coming up in a few months and the last thing I want is to look bloated and to feel so bad about myself (I am a bridesmaid).

And one more question, how do you deal with the holidays (Easter is coming up and I am freaking out over the family dinner and chocolate eggs). I want to be in recovery but with the thought of Easter and the wedding coming up, I just dont know how to cope!

Big hug to you, thank you so much for this great site.

Shaye Says



Hi Ally!

That's so exciting about being a bridesmaid for your cousins wedding! I can understand the pressure to look good though - as I was a bridesmaid at my cousins wedding 2 weeks ago!

To be entirely honest, I had wanted to drop a kg or 2 for her wedding... but as time went on I realised that it doesn't really matter. The day is for her and that is where everyones attention should be. My weight stayed exactly the same and I had the most amazingly fun day - as did she! Would weighing any less have improved the day? No. The day was about love, togetherness, celebration... Not weighing a specific amount :)

I think reminding yourself of those things will help you in your journey. Your weight might be on your mind - but chances are everyone else is thinking of something entirely different... the bride, the occassion and the beauty of marriage :)

If you do gain a little bit of weight during your recovery - try not to 'feel bad about yourself' - this is a negative feeling - and believe it or not, we can choose to feel one way or another. Choose to feel happy that you have progressed to that stage, that you're on the recovery journey! Everytime a negative thought starts creeping into your head, challenge it! Ask yourself if you would think that about somebody you love - if they were in the same boat... and finish off by altering your thought to something neutral or positive like...

"Yes, I may be feeling bloated, but at least I am on the journey to a life without bulimia"

or

"Yes, I'm bloated, but I have a habit of being my worst critic - chances are nobody else has even noticed"

or

"Okay, I am bloated, but nobody will be looking at my tummy because my face looks so pretty!"

It's all about catching those negaticve thoughts and correcting them! This is called sub-conscious re-programming and I promise you, when you persist at it, it makes a difference.

Don't stress with easter coming up... Understand that it may be more difficult to stick to your structured eating, but try your best anyway. be kind and gentle with yourself if you slip up... It's definitely not the end of the world! Try to understand that your recovery doesn't need to be perfect... You'll have ups and downs, but that's completely normal and it's okay.

Don't cut out the treats of easter completely, allow yourself to enjoy a specific amount of chocolate... But, as you do with structured eating, eat it slowly and savour it. Give any excess away before you have the chance to binge on it. Be the kind and giving easter bunny in the street to strangers... it'll make them feel good - and you'll feel good becaus eyou don't have to worry about having excesssive chocolate in the house!

Most importantly, remember to have fun. Enjoy easter for the non-food-related joys in it... being with family, time off work, celebrations and so on. Make a real effort to conect with people this easter and that will take some of the emphasis off the food :)

I hope this helps Ally! Keep up your awesome work and thank you for posting on my site!

love
Shaye

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of your-bulimia-recovery.com
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community


The Bulimia Recovery Program