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How To Get Over Bulimia: My Journey Of Sharing Secrets and Learning how To Eat Again

I had no idea how to get over bulimia... I'd been suffering from this dark illness for nearly 1/2 my life - and I wanted out!

Bulimia was consuming my every waking moment - and it threatened to steal from me the one thing that brought me so much happiness...

My boyfriend Tom.

I first met Tom when I was 15 years old. It was a very dark part of my life - shortly after leaving my home of Zimbabwe to live in New Zealand. I seriously need a 'pick-me-up' and, Tom was it..

When I saw him for the first time, I felt excited, nervous, flustered... I felt like I had just met the boy I'd spend the rest of my life with...

I fell in love - instantly.

It took another year before Tom and I finally gathered the guts to really talk to each other and get to know each other... Shortly after that we were together every waking moment of the day.

I felt like I could open up to Tom and tell him almost anything... Anything that was, besides the fact that I was bulimic...

As the years went by, Tom and I celebrated 1,2,3,4 years together... Time was passing, but still, I had no idea how to get over bulimia.

I thought I'd be hiding this from Tom for the rest of my life...

My bulimia had gone from bad to worse and my moods had become more and more unpredictable. I'd swing into deep phases of depression that Tom simply couldn't understand. He wanted to know what was going on in my head - but I knew I could never tell him.

Tom was finding my weeks - sometimes months - of darkness hard to deal with...

Bulimia was pulling us apart.

My bulimia addiction was so severe that I began to sacrifice time with Tom to spend time with food... binging and purging... all alone in my dark little world.

It was easier to be alone because I didn't need to act and I didn't need to lie...

I could binge and purge to my tired hearts content.

 

The Turning point:
Learn how To get Over Bulimia Or Face Losing Tom...

At the age of 20, I accepted that I didn't know how to get over bulimia on my own... I needed help.

I knew that this illness was not only killing me - but also threatening to push Tom away from me.

With butterflies in my stomach and sweat dropping form every pore in my body, I made the appointment to get help. I booked in to see the therapist at my university.

Strangely enough, a week after my first session, Tom and I were sitting in the car... He turned to me and said:

"Shaye, do you sometimes throw up after you eat"...

I felt like my world was crumbling down around me... Tom knew my secret...

No longer would I be that perfect girl he fell in love with... He knew I was broken... damaged... Crazy...

I knew there was no point denying it... So I told him, after 4 1/2 years of being together, that I was bulimic.

He wasn't angry and he wasn't disappointed. He was just sad for me and wanted to help however he could.

how to get over bulimia
4 years after my bulimia recovery...
Enjoying Toms company in Thailand age 24

I told Tom that I'd started seeing a therapist to learn how to get over bulimia. I told him that there wasn't much else he could do to help - besides continue being there for me.

From that point on, Tom never pushed the topic of my bulimia onto me... If I felt like talking, he was there to listen.

In his own quiet, gentle way, Tom was my pillar of strength as I embarked on my journey to learn how to eat again...

 

 

For so many years, my eating had been chaotic and unnatural. I Associated it with so much evil-pleasure and physical pain...

I knew that learning how to eat normally was key to learning how to get over bulimia...

At first I believed that my body had lost the ability to digest... I thought that if I started eating again, my weight would balloon out of control.

I honestly believed that a life without bulimia would mean a life eating just lettuce... But, for recovery, I was willing to accept even that!

What I discovered on my journey was that, once given time to recover, my body could digest food... I could eat fruit, breads, cake, chocolate, nuts... even pizza - and my metabolism could power through it...

I discovered, that recovery from bulimia is real... You can eat normally again... And, your body does forgive you for the years of abuse... You do heal.

But, in the early stages you need to coach it, teach it... And guide it back towards a normal relationship with food...

You do this by using structured eating...

 

How To Get Over Bulimia With The Help Of Structured Eating

There's no rocket science to structure eating... It basically means planning your means and snacks each day...

During my recovery I planned 3 meals and 3 snacks per day... I aimed at eating every 2.5 to 3 hours... I made sure that my meals were just the right size - so that I wasn't left hungry, and I wasn't uncomfortably full.

Whenever I felt the urge to binge, I would remind myself that I had a meal or snack just around the corner... The knowledge that food was coming soon was usually enough to push the binge urges aside.

It also taught my sub conscious mind that food was always there and it didn't need to be held in the forefront of my mind with such obsession. I was allowed, with unconditional permission, to eat.

Of course structured eating didn't work perfectly right from the word go... All things take practice to perfect - and structured eating is no different. Persist at it... Give yourself time and kindness... You will get there.

When I first started structured eating and keeping down my food, I felt full and uncomfortable most of the time... but, this did go away. Say to yourself, over and over again...

"Bloating is temporary - recovery is forever!"

and...

"Food is my friend - I can handle food"

 

What To Expect Of Your Weight During Bulimia Recovery

Structured eating will help you stabilize at a healthy and natural weight. This may mean losing some weight, or it may mean gaining some...

If you gain some weight, don't stress yourself out... A lot of it will just be your body re-hydrating itself with water.

Myself - I gained 3 kg's... but, it's the best trade I've ever made in my life!

Have a go at structure eating - what have you got to lose? Be persistent and you'll find it could be the key in learning how to get over bulimia!

For other helpful bulimia recovery steps, download my free e-book "10 Steps To Bulimia Recovery" below...

 

 

Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of your-bulimia-recovery.com
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community


The Bulimia Recovery Program