An Emotional Eating Disorder poem That I wrote when I was bulimic
This page displays an eating disorder poem that I wrote when I was in the deepest and darkest days of bulimia nervosa. Poetry was one way that I could express what I was feeling.
You might never guess that this was a poem about bulimia... I never actually say the words "bulimia" or "eating disorder"... The reason for this is that I was so ashamed of being bulimic. The thought of anyone ever finding my poetry in my drawers was enough to make me leave those words out! Bulimia was my secret - I wanted it to stay that way.
My bulimia poetry is symbolic and I will explain the meaning of the poem beneath it. Try and see if you can figure it out without looking ahead!
Have you written an eating disorder poem to release sadness, anger... Frustration, even hope?share your Eating Disorder Poetry with other people who are suffering! |
Below you'll find my bulimia poem. I hope that you enjoy it...
-- CRAZY WORLD --
Each day the same,
I live this game,
Don't know the way,
Don't know how to play.
I Need someone to explain,
How to breathe again.
Suffocate and die,
I fall and I fly,
Always believe that I will find
A way to understand my crazy mind.
Me, I just one.
No one, To so many...
Known but unknown,
I'm living Un shown.
No one to me,
No one to be...
Living and dead...
Starving but fed.
Help me live,
help me learn,
be my water, but let me burn.
Understand me please,
Understand How i fell...
Be my heaven within this hell...
When the living lie
and the walking die
All people are blind,
All left behind.
In this living world,
full of dead,
always hungry, never fed.
Are the souls of those who walk alone...
Trying to find their way back home.
Yea - I totally get that it's a bit of an odd poem. It's dark, depressing and a bit muddled. It might not be obvious, but it is an eating disorder poem through and through. I've explained a few of the paragraphs below:
Paragraph 1:
I'm talking about living the 'game' - by 'game' I'm referring to bulimia. I call it a game because it's not real - it's a world of lies and pretending. I then flick to say 'don't know the way, don't know how to play... need someone to explain how to breathe again' Here, I'm talking about life (or living) and I am calling for help because I've forgotten how to live without bulimia.
Paragraph 2:
In this paragraph I am referring to having moved to New Zealand where nobody knows me. I feel like a nobody. This is obvious when I say 'Me I'm just one, no one to so many'.
'Known but unknown' shows that the people who do know me, such as my family and friends - don't actually know the real me. They don't know about the bulimia which consumes me life.
Probably the most important phrase in this poem is the following one in paragraph 2:
Living and dead...
Starving but fed.
This sentence illustrates that I am alive, but I feel as though my soul has died. It talks about my starving body - but the fact that it is also always fed - This refers to constant binge eating and then throwing up. Starving has a double meaning - I am starving because a) Food never gets to remain in my tummy. b) I am starving, or lacking from something that I need in my life - something that eating can not satisfy.
Heck - it's hard to try and explain the meaning of a poem! I hope you kind of understood my explanation! :)
Try Figure out the meaning behind this poem...
Here's another eating disorder poem that I wrote. I'm going to leave it up to you to try and figure out what it means! It's quite deep - so I hope that some people will get it...
HINT: first day = Monday
-- FIRST DAY 7 TIMES --
First day brings a new.
Doubt spirals in my heart.
First day sunrise hope
Is questioned from the start.
By the time is half,
I long for first day more...
Only 3 more sunsets,
Shall I fight this mad-man's war.
First Day comes again.
Again i set my guard.
Reverberating constant doubt,
again within my heart.
Within my heart cries evermore
for first day seven times
waiting, doubted, eager eyed
for the decipher to my rhymes...
Share your own poems about eating disorders...
I've shared my eating disorder poem to help others out there who may be suffering... I would really appreciate it if you would share your poetry too!
Your poetry will be extremely valuable! It lets other sufferers know that they're not alone.
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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of your-bulimia-recovery.com
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community
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