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Consumed by FOOD

I'm not really sure where to start, I've never done anything like this before. I have had disordered eating since I was around 12 (i'm now 19). My eating patterns best fit into the catagory of bulimia. These days I binge daily (sometimes all day long)and I compensate by sometimes vomiting, but mostly not having my insulin (I'm a diabetic and not having insulin stops my body from absorbing the food I eat). I am overweight and have been for a long time. I have been in therapy for a long time and I have an excellent psychiatrist.

My purging behaviours have improved but as a result my binging has become a lot worse. I can no longer leave the house without binging, i cannot make it to lunch without binging. I have gained a lot of weight and I am so ashamed of myself. I can't stand being like this anymore.

I feel completely overwhelmed trying to get my life back. I don't know how to live without binging. I'm desperate to change and to lose weight (in a HEALTHY manner). I have very little peer support because it is very difficult to explain the role my diabetes plays in my eating disorder.

I am killing myself and I am suffering from severe diabetes complications, my teeth are rotting and i have terrible stomach bloating.

My eating disorder has left me completely isolated from life. I'm sad and I feel so alone. I guess I'm just looking for somewhere to tell my story, seek support and generally vent.

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community

The Bulimia Recovery Program