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Bulimia - What I thought would be the best of both worlds....

I'm a 20-year old female and have been bulimic for the past 2 years and I am sick of it!

I became bulimic as a way to lose weight, and still be able to eat whatever I wanted because I LOVE all foods. I always have been one to not feel satisfied after one helping but was able to keep the weight off due to playing sports year round in high-school. Once college started I wasn't active enought to keep off the weight. I came up with this idea to eat what I wanted but to then purge it up! This surely will be the best of both worlds, right? Not exactly. This has consumed my life unfortunately. It's a battle EVERY day, and up until recently I've been some what numb to it all, not realizing that I COULD stop and that I NEED to. I got through my first day without purging yesterday and it was not something that I was even trying to do, it just happened.

Night time is the hardest for me because I eat very well and don't get that "itch" for food until about 8 pm and then I let loose on cookies, ice cream, pizza,cereal, candy, you name it. SOOOO I'm hoping that if I keep myself busy and when the urge strikes I plan to take a second to just breathe, think of the positives of NOT binging, get away from my triggers and pray for help because I know I can't do this on my own and frankly, I don't want to.

So, good luck to everyone else out there who is struggling, I feel your pain and applaud you for taking the beginning steps of recovery by finding this blog!

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community

The Bulimia Recovery Program