My best friend, Robyn, a suffering bulimic, commited suicide. This is her story (part of her suicide note):
I'm sorry I'm not perfect. I tried to be the best I can be but I guess that wasn't enough. Don't worry, I don't blame you guys for hating me, I hated myself too. Now that I'm gone, I guess it would be okay for me to confess... I'm bulimic. Had been for 4 years. Shocking, huh? Guess no one thought fat girls can have eating disorders too.
I threw up for the first time when I was 10. You won't believe how good it felt. How easy it was to stick my fingers down my throat. It was the easy way out. I would binge and then purge. It became a daily thing. I could eat whatever I want and my weight would still be going down. Every girl's dream was my reality. But that wasn't enough. Even after I got down to X lbs, you guys still called my fat. My hip bones still wouldn't stick out and my stomach wasn't flat.
After 4 years of suffering, my body still wasn't good enough. I still wasn't skinny or pretty enough. I thought Mia was my friend. Guess not. I'm sick of trying. So I stopped. I'm sorry, I guess. Sorry for not being skinny or pretty or perfect. Sorry for always taking the easy way out. Sorry for being me.
Robyn was beautiful. If only she could see it. Bulimia isn't the answer.
To all of you girls out there, you are perfect. You are good enough. Don't let this disease take over your mind. Don't let it control you. It's not too late to get help. You can recover.
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