Being thin - beliefs that cause bulimia
Can you please PLEASE correct these twisted thoughts for me?
Thin = the only true definition of beauty
A synonym for happy (indeed, a prerequisite for happiness)
The single most important objective in life
The key to becoming famous and successful
A guarantee that you'll be loved and appreciated (the only guarantee...)
The only way to attract attention and praise
The only way to make somebody proud
Proof that you're not greedy
Proof that you have self-control
I want to kick this harmful habit (throwing up after meals), but these ideas that I have about Being Thin are making it really hard for me to recover from bulimia. Any words of advice? Cheers!
Wow, it's amazing how the mind of somebody with disordered eating is so twisted - I remember thinking exactly these things that you've written...
I remember thinking that being thin meant that I had control, being thin meant that I would be respected, being thin meant that I was popular...
But gradually I realized that bulimia and my beliefs about being thin actually stripped me of all these things...
I wanted to be in control, but my desperation to be thin lead to bulimia - which stripped me of my self control and left me a prisoner to a disease that I hated.
I wanted to be respected - but my desperation to be thin made me lose any drop of respect that I had for myself - I hated myself.
I wanted to be popular - but my need to be thin drove me to isolating myself from friends and family. It drove me to school lunches in the computer room - so that I could slip away and throw up unnoticed. It drove me to wanting to be by myself, all the time, so that I could binge and purge to cover my fears and insecurities...
I thought that being thin was so important. I thought that it would make my life so much better... Being bulimia and being thin were the most important things in my life... They were more important than being happy... more important than being healthy... more important than anything... even love.
Is being thin really that important? Surely not.
I know that everyone can make a full recovery from bulimia... If one person can succeed - then we all can! I think it's just a matter of:
1) Taking the baby steps that lead to recovery and
2) Knowing what steps to take... which I hope I offer much info on through my website and program
If you have any other questions, please just ask - I hope this has helped you out a bit.
Stay strong and remember - It doesn't matter what the numbers on the scale say - you are beautiful!