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Beat the Bloat, "You Are Not Alone"

by Jessica

A tom boy, into sports, and a strong independent girl at heart in my youth until something tragic changed my entire life. I have struggled with Anorexia,Bulimia,and Depression since i was 13 and have been followed by a doctor since i was 14. From grade 8- 12 (hopefully).I have been surrounded with it ever since, my mom suffered with it, my twin, my cousin, and multiple of my friends.I am now 17, in grade 12 and my eating disorder has blocked me from multiple things in my life. Doctors say that my eating disorder was just caught of of my twin sister as she struggled with it first and eventually recovered a year into my disorder.
It started off because I wasn't happy with the way I looked, but eventually it gradually changed to a routine. Now that I think about it, I really do want to succeed and recover although the bloating is a huge fear as I suffered with severe constipation when I was hospitalized.People make fun of the way that I look (tiny frame), and I have always tried to prove them wrong, but every time I try relapse. Last summer I lost someone I really loved due to this disorder, I felt like it was holding him back from a fun teenage life, so I broke up with him.
I feel like I have ruined myself forever. My throat always hurts, my stomach kills all the time, and I can never get it into my head that the bloating isn't going to last forever.I made a comment to my mother that she might live longer than me the other day without realizing she heard and we both broke down. Many scares and tears have resulted from this disorder. All I want is to be able to say "I did it, I survived, I won, I beat this!"

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community

The Bulimia Recovery Program