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Ashamed and embarrased sums it up

by Trish
( Australia)

Its ran my life- everything was about how to get my last feed up as privately as possible. I'm ashamed of how I did this sometimes.

It made me feel lazy and pathetic that I couldn't be healthy and loose weight the normal way. I just wanted to be normal the whole time I was doing it.

I was soooo moody and I hated that

I do want to kick it in the butt. I have not had a slip for a month now and I am proud. The 3kg I have put on has been hard to accept but there is no option of going back. I am eating healthy, exercising and if I still put weight on then so be it... what else can I do? definitely not throw up because I would just have to start ALL over again. I am working towards being healthy and having a healthy body for another baby.

I struggle to accept the 3kg weight gain in the last month (there will most likely be more and that upsets me) but This site has been AMAZING. reading the experiences and rationalities behind things I have experienced emotionally and physically is the only reason I can say I am now a month free of it. THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU.

I am doing this for my two year old son and I have to keep reminding myself that the weight gain is for him so he has his mummy here. I was being so selfish not thinking of him when I was suffering bulimia. what if I didn't give it up..... I want to be here for him. I am so sad that I was so self consumed

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Article by Shaye Boddington
Author of
and creator of The Bulimia Recovery Program and Community

The Bulimia Recovery Program