2 days In bulimia recovery
I have never been the "support group" type but maybe that was because I was in denial before. I went to the dr last week and had a typical blood test done for something not related to my bulimia. My doctor called me the next day and told me that some of my results were back and that my potassium was incredibly low and that she was calling in a prescription for me that I was to begin taking that evening... I want to say that this was my turning point.
I always thought of myself as a smart bulimic (if there is such a thing), I tried very hard to maintain a balance while feeding my "beast". I took my vitamins and made sure that any food I did keep down was high in nutrients. The idea that my low potassium had some how slipped by me really freaked me out. I am not blind to the effects of low potassium and I would prefer for my heart to keep beating.
I have not purged since I got this news on Friday and it has been tough. The evenings are the worst, my husband is at work and my kids are in bed. I am alone, left to my own devices. So far I have stayed strong and I am proud but I feel horrible too....very raw and exposed if that makes any sense at all.
This is the longest I have gone without purging in almost 3 years (I have been bulimic for 15 years with periods of recovery while pregnant).
It's hard to imagine my life without it, though I really want to. I cannot wrap my head around how it is so easy for me not to purge while I am pregnant and yet so tough when I have to stop when it is just for me and not a baby inside of me.
Wish me luck, okay.
Return to bulimia support groups.